Sadness and pain

Tonight’s a bit off topic I guess. My pain has increased since starting the antibiotic . Of course the side effect of taking the meds is Dystonia and increased pain. So I need to decide to deal with the pain or stop the antibiotic. It’s hard to decide right now as I have another issue on my mind…my dog
I hurt emotionally right now as I had known something was wrong a yr ago. Told the vet and they said it was nothing. That nothing , her limping has continued. But now we also have a lump on her nose (between her nose and eyes) the lump has now been bleeding on and off a few days. I’m sure in that’s puss as well. I’m worried at this point. She’s more moody and the new vet hasn’t seen her yet. She’s got an appt later this week and its killing me to see her this way. She is 7 yrs old. But still I can’t bear to loose her. She’s gotten me through alot of rough spots and I know if its her time then it is. I’m scared and I can’t let her go without knowing what’s wrong with her.
Anyway for today that’s all I’m posting. I’m making her as comfortable as I can and making me uncomfortable.

Migraines return

I use to have the worst migraines ever. That was before they started me on Neuro medicines for rls, Parkinson’s and Dystonia. After that came the Rsd which the drs took me off all the Neuro type medicines.
Today I woke with a severe migraine. My daughter heated up some leftovers and it took me forever to at them as my jaw was starting to hurt and make it worse. So all day I’ve been battling these and tonight’s not much difference. I’m hoping tomorrow will be better.
I did get some surprises in the mail today though. O e was a hat from the Dystonia foundation and the other some blue earring with a silver ribbon on them which say hope. Tis made my migraine not seem so bad for a few minutes.
Tonight I just have to step back and say this is all happening for some unknown reason, maybe to teach the drs that things can happen at any age? Or for future medical practices and research. I don’t know and ill never know. I just want the pain to stop.
I have attached pictures of the thing I got today that brightened my day. Also fell tonight but found my journal from the Dystonia foundation I got last year. I’m ok but worried about how things are gonna be tomorrow and further out.

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Migraines return

I use to have the worst migraines ever. That was before they started me on Neuro medicines for rls, Parkinson’s and Dystonia. After that came the Rsd which the drs took me off all the Neuro type medicines.
Today I woke with a severe migraine. My daughter heated up some leftovers and it took me forever to at them as my jaw was starting to hurt and make it worse. So all day I’ve been battling these and tonight’s not much difference. I’m hoping tomorrow will be better.
I did get some surprises in the mail today though. O e was a hat from the Dystonia foundation and the other some blue earring with a silver ribbon on them which say hope. Tis made my migraine not seem so bad for a few minutes.
Tonight I just have to step back and say this is all happening for some unknown reason, maybe to teach the drs that things can happen at any age? Or for future medical practices and research. I don’t know and ill never know. I just want the pain to stop.
I have attached pictures of the thing I got today that brightened my day. Also fell tonight but found my journal from the Dystonia foundation I got last year. I’m ok but worried about how things are gonna be tomorrow and further out.

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Another issues

Right now I have had to make decisions that I shouldn’t …we shouldn’t have to choose between treatments that work all because the insurance company’s don’t want to pay. I shouldn’t have to choose between 2 treatments which are a few blocks from each other all because the insurance only pays for one trip to an office and they don’t get reimbursed for the second one. If its on the way to or from what does it matter as I usually end up waiting on other clients to get done with their appointments. I shouldn’t have to take more medicine because the insurance doesn’t want to pay for as many massage therapy visits as I need (I only go once a week)
I’m at that point where I’m forced to choose between pt and allergy shots, or massage therapy and another medicine, its a never ending battle and only going to get worse. So I’m stuck at a stand still of going to multiple specialists to see if there’s other options we haven’t explored. The kicker is the insurance will pay over $900 for a lotion for my foot each month and not pay for a $30 visit to the massage therapy I was going to. The lotion is a ketamine compound which I actually am glad it’s helping but I need it for other areas and they will not prescribe for multiple areas right now.
I’m hopeful right now that things will come full circle. I wish my family would be more understanding and I wish my friends who deserted me would see that I need them.

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Really? Why me?

Ok so I tested positive for peanut allergies a few years back but they were thinking it was really my corn allergy since I was eating the coated stuff. Well I have news for them no its not. I decided in the middle of an insomnia attack to try a granola bar which had a ton of peanuts since its all natural. Well within a few minutes I felt my throat was closing up so I went to the bathroom and forced it to come back up. Along with that came puss so I knew I was in trouble. Everyone’s asleep, I can’t get to my nebulizer so I got to my inhaler. Wasnt sure if it worked so jumped into the shower and got some steam therapy. It helped a little. I was still coughing up puss though. So I got back in bed and the min my hubby’s alarm went off and he reached for the snooze I said get up and I need the steroid treatment now and in full. I’ve been taking half and then an hour later the other half. Today I knew I needed it all and the I did a nebulizer treatment which seems to help but I feel that tightness in my chest and throat still. Ugg what a morning and I haven’t been to sleep yet. Good thing I was planning on calling the allergist today.

Well I’m gonna probably have to do another nebulizer treatment here shortly. So I better go. Have a good one and be safe.

Pneumonia antibiotic take two

Well yesterday I started my second round of antibiotics for my pneumonia. I’m having side effects from being off the Neuro meds and am requesting my pcp to restart them only once daily so I can see if they help. I have my Parkinsonism returning. It’s not all the time, just tremors at rest. I can deal with that just as long as they don’t et worse. What I can’t go on with is the severe spasming in my legs I’m having and the intense pain. I’m hoping this is an easy fix but I’m sure it’s not.
My reynauds is going haywire and the sjorgens is there but doesn’t affect me much that we are aware. I swear the fever spikes can go away though. One min I’m fine the next I need the fan or air on. Then I’m freezing and putting my sweater on. I’d rather do the sweater thing then use the fan. At least the sweater I can take with wherever I go where a fans not as easy.
I was hoping that when they increased my gabapentin to 3 times a day to counteract these side effects of coming off the Neuro meds I’d be ok. I also have migraines that will not go away. I don’t have then 24/7 don’t get me wrong but when I do get them they doe with a vengeance . I’m thinking maybe putting me on klonopin again, even though my insurance will not fully cover it m it might be worth a shot. Also my migraine meds which I found a little box of the packets, might help. It’s just getting ahold of the dr when he’s part of a conglomerate hospital chain is real hard to do and alot of the time it will take at least a good 24 hours to et a call back if u get one.
Well it’s early in the morning here and I need sleep so I’m off to turn the iPad off. Hoping the nominated will let me get some sleep.

Can it get any worse?

So today basicly w a continuation of yesterday. Dystonic storms, RSD flares the whole nine yards. Then added to that pneumonia is worsening and I’m scared of going to the hospital and them treating me like a criminal cause of a pain condition. Seems like drs are thinking the worse of you just because of a dx. My daughters dr does the same thing. Tomorrow I will see if my allergist will admit me or not. I’m on antibiotics but yet I’m worse. Go figure. My chest pains are back and the nurse when I attempted to get my shots said you definitely have pneumonia. It’s still there.
Well my in home help came and left without anything being said. She found out quickly I have pneumonia and she called the office saying I didn’t want her there when she was the one who didn’t want to be here. She’s no longer my worker. It may take up to two weeks to get a new person in here. Other option is to go start over with a different agency.
I cried some last night and alot today. My husbands back to working six days a week. He thinks that its the only way to make any money and keep above what the insurance isn’t paying. Although I refuse to let him pay for a med that the insurance is suppose to cover. He’s worried about me and at this point I don’t blame him. I refuse to take my emergency meds unless I feel I really need them. Ugg.
I’m so pissed and yet upset at the world. I’m mad since he’s insinuating I’m the reason he has to work all these extra hours. I’m the reason we are where we are. If he’s so unhappy he should put me in a home that way I be taken care of and then he can do what he wants. I’m so over being stuck in a place no one wants me. I don’t want him to feel stuck either just because I’m sick.
Oh and pt is on hold. They got the approval from primary insurance but Medicaid is holding all this up. By the time they get things in order ill be weaker then I already am and they will have to redo the order and that will be another month of getting no where waiting for the state to make it an approval. Get on with it. They are suppose to help me not make it so I can’t get treatment.
Ok off my today soapbox. Basicly everything acted up and my legs are like jello, my right arm feels like a piece of wood along with my shoulder feeling like a lug nut. I’m in pain and no one will help me.